


A Cereal Serial

by lajimolala93



Category: Cereal Mascots - Fandom
Genre: Cereal, How Do I Tag, Mascots, Survival, Trapped on an island
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-13
Updated: 2020-11-13
Packaged: 2021-03-09 19:06:52
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 3
Words: 1,695
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27541288
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lajimolala93/pseuds/lajimolala93
Summary: When cereal mascots find themselves isolated on a strange island one thing becomes very clear: there can only be one survivor. "Eat or be eaten" has never been taken so literally.
Kudos: 2





	1. Sugar Coma

**Author's Note:**

> This is my very first fic. It doesn't really fit into an fandoms, and it's quite silly. I hope someone besides myself reads this. I only have three chapters so far, but will gladly continue the saga if I gain any interest at all.
> 
> What cereal mascots would you like to see?

Dig'em woke up in a haze. This was starting to get ridiculous. He used to only be a social Sugar Smacker, but his life had taken a turn for the worse. People used to love him! All he had to do was hop up in front of a couple of kids and ask if they wanted to have a cereal party. They always said yes and their parents laughed it off, happy for their children to have a distraction. It didn't take long for people to catch on to the detrimental effects of constant consumption of sugary cereal. Dig'em was no longer allowed to solicit to America's children and the adults had outgrown Smacks. He was alone. That's when Sugar Smacks became a crutch and eventually an addiction. That's when the hallucinations started. Dig'em created his own nemesis, a cat name Kitty. Kitty was as obsessed with Smacking as he was and would do anything to get his paws on some, even steal. Dig'em made it his mission in life to stop the evil Kitty! One day he woke up in the bottom of a well coated with sugar residue and crumbled corn puffs. He'd been out for days. That's when he realized he had literally hit well bottom and figuratively hit rock bottom. Dig'em realized Kitty was himself the whole time. He swore off Smacks for years, still being the face of the cereal but never partaking himself. Dig'em was successful until a few days ago. He opened his door to beautiful red boxes and boxes of Sugar Smacks. It was unclear how long the sugar coma lasted this time. The world was hazy. Everything was green and sticky. Dig'em sat up, trying to get his bearings. He didn't recognize anything. There was nothing but thick vegetation and the sound of crashing waves. In the distance he heard a tiger roar “ggggghrrrrreaaaaattttt!"


	2. Crouching Tiger, Hidden Rooster

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How long can a tiger and rooster remain friends when the flakes are removed and only fear remains?

Cornelius Rooster was hiding in a tree. He wasn't sure how he got there. Roosters can't fly, not even cereal roosters. He only knew there was a tiger on the loose. The wind ruffled his feathers, probably swinging his scent right out into the jungle. Silence was the key. The sun had risen six times since he'd woke up on the jungle island with Tony at his side. They had been friends for years, both preferring to eat their corn in flake form. Tony had always been the outgoing one and had many other friends. People were naturally attracted to him. Despite his boisterous appearance, Tony the Tiger enjoyed quiet evenings with Cornelius. Their friendship seemed an unlikely one, but they had a strong bond. Their first day on the island was rough, but Cornelius felt safe. Many things would love to eat a rooster, but not many things would mess with a giant tiger. Tony grew up in the jungle and knew all the ins and outs of the place. He claimed if you've seen one jungle, you've seen them all. Cornelius compulsively crowed every morning as the sun came up, revealing their position. Tony could take anything the jungle could throw at him, but he wanted to avoid as much conflict as he could. He figured out that Cornelius wouldn't crow if he was in the dark during sunrise, so he would tie his bandana around the rooster's head. Tony had begun to change by the third night on the jungle island. He was more cranky and had a tendency to walk on all fours instead of upright. Cornelius questioned him, but Tony shrugged it off, claiming the atmosphere was just bringing back old habits. Tony finally confessed his secret on night five. He didn't eat Frosted Flakes because of taste preference. The sugar coating on the flakes was the key to his personification, and he was slowly slipping back into his old natural tiger self due to its absence. Tony insisted Cornelius run and leave him behind. There's nothing a tiger loves more that the flesh of roosters. That's common knowledge. Cornelius refused to leave his friend's side, insisting they would face any obstacle together. The rooster woke up on the sixth day with the sun and crowed loudly. His friend hadn't covered his head like usual. He heard a low growl and saw the ferns rustle. A giant man-sized tiger leaped from his cover and Cornelius ran as fast as his little rooster feet could take him. He ended up losing the tiger formally known as Tony and was anxiously hiding in the aforementioned tree. Cornelius knew two things. One: roosters crow at sunrise. Two: tigers climb trees. The sky began to lighten, and his throat began to itch. He could feel a crow coming on but his efforts to push it down were futile. A "cockadoodledoo" rang out across the jungle, followed swiftly by a terrifying "grrrrrrrreaaatttt" and the ominous sound of claws on tree bark.


	3. Follow Your Nose To Certain Death

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A toucan and a Cap'n walk onto a boat...

Sam followed his nose to the highest tree he could find. He figured he could see the whole island on a clear day from where he was perched. Unfortunately, there was no such thing as a clear day on this island. No tree rose above the fog and mist of the jungle, so there was no chance of seeing where that mad captain moored his ship. Hopefully that meant the captain couldn’t see Sam either. It had been at least five days since he and his nephews found themselves stranded on a beach, covered in sand and confusion. They saw a ship off in the distance and decided to make a flap for it, hoping they would be quickly rescued and be done with this unsolicited vacation. The man on deck called himself Cap’n Crunch, though Sam didn’t think he was wearing enough stripes to be a captain. Oh well, one must never question their saviors. The cap’n said he was just floating by and decided to give his crew some shore leave. Jolly good luck for sure that he happened by when he did. He assured the toucans his crew would be back on the boat shortly and they could shove off to civilization.   
The sun set, yet the crew had not returned. Sam felt rumbles in his tumbles. He had no idea how long he’d gone without eating. There was no telling how many days he and his nephews were out. He asked Crunch if he happened to have any looped fruit on his ship, but the captain assured him he had something way better. Sam followed his newfound friend to the captain’s quarters (no minors allowed) where a bottle of some pleasant liquid awaited them on an ornate table. Crunch poured them both a glass and Sam was delighted to see it tasted almost like his beloved Froot Loops. It was called Crunchberry Wine, made from the finest berries harvested from Crunch Island. The wine went straight to Sam’s head and the world went black once more. He woke just in time for dinner. Three crew members entered the captain’s quarters, each carrying one of those fancy dinner trays with the silver dome things on top. They placed the platters or trays or whatever on the table and removed the domes, revealing three beautifully roasted birds. Sam politely refused dinner, stating he did not partake in fowl. The captain understood of course, and offered to show Sam where he’d be sleeping. The door opened to reveal the severed heads of the toucan nephews rolling around the deck like chickens with their bodies cut off. Sam squawked in horror. He turned around to find Cap’n Crunch smiling maniacally. His nephews were the appetizers and now Sam would be the main course. Suddenly, he remembered he could fly and started flapping his wings as hard as he could. Its not easy to master lift and thrust when you’re filled to the beak with wine. He slowly but surely made it off the ship’s deck and into cloud cover. Crunch was demanding to know why no one clipped Sam’s wings like he ordered. He then started shouting orders to lower the gang plank and fire the big boom boom balls (no way he’s a real captain). Toucan Sam survived the onslaught of weaponry fired at him and somehow made it to the safety of the trees. Let this be a lesson to you. Never drink Crunchberry Wine on an empty stomach.  
Sam was miserably hiding for days. This jungle was different that the one he was used to. The greens were darker, the rains harsher, and things wanted to eat him. He could hear a tiger growling in the distance, the toucan’s natural predator. Sam knew he couldn’t be safe in the tree forever, but he wasn’t thinking about that now. He was starving. None of the fruit surround him was in loop form, and that was crucial to his diet. He wondered how long it would take him to starve to death. Maybe he should just find that tiger and get it over with. One bite and he’d be sharing a bowl of Froot Loops in heaven with his nephews. Sam made up his mind. When the sun rose he’d fly into the jaws of whatever carnivore was closest.  
The sky lightened and he could see the foliage rustling over to his right. Sam was sure it was the tiger he’d been hearing. He closed his eyes, preparing to follow his nose straight into the tiger’s jaws, when he heard the crow of a rooster followed shortly by claws on wood. Sam was devastated and extremely jealous. Why did this bastard get to leave the party before him? He flew straight towards the ruckus, pushing the stupid rooster out of tiger’s clutches in a “pick me pick me” fashion. This surprised the hell out of the tiger who promptly fell backwards and plummeted to his death. The rooster (who we know as Cornelius), flabbergasted, wrapped his nearly useless wings around Toucan Sam. Sam stared at the rooster with an expression that said “fuck off,” shrugged off his embrace and promptly flew off into the sunrise. His nose had failed him this time, but he’d surely find his doom soon enough.


End file.
